Volume 1, Chapter 156: Both of them were somewhat stirred by emotion.

Following the Liang family’s annual gala, Liang Jinmo finally had some free time.

Xu Zhi tried various recipes to cook for him, and recently, she had gradually made a few new discoveries:
For instance, his diet was not entirely without preferences; at the dining table, he clearly favored leafy greens, and among meats, he preferred beef.
Another example was that when he had free time, he liked to stay at home and read.

Her hands grew tired from knitting a scarf, so she ran over to the study and asked him, "Don't you ever go out to play?"

Whether it was Liang Muzhi or many of her classmates, most of them were restless. When holidays arrived, if not nearby malls and local attractions, they would travel abroad; in short, they always had to go out somewhere.

Liang Jinmo replied, "What's so fun about going out?"

Xu Zhi thought to herself that he was indeed very different from Liang Muzhi. If it were Liang Muzhi, being stuck at home for two days would drive him crazy.

At that moment, Liang Jinmo was sitting behind the desk. Xu Zhi leaned against the desk, standing beside him. Seeing her lost in thought, he asked, "Do you think I'm very boring?"

Xu Zhi nodded. "A little."

Liang Jinmo was silent for two seconds. "Where do you want to go?"

"That's not it," Xu Zhi explained. "I feel that being with you is wonderful anywhere, as long as it's a place that lets you relax. You tense up too much when you work, but..."

She paused. "Life is very long, you know. You should find things that make you happy to do, have some hobbies... and then it won't be so tedious."

Liang Jinmo thought about it. In the past, hobbies were actually a luxury to him; after all, managing to live a smooth and steady life was already quite good.

However, now that she brought it up, he was willing to make a change. He said, "If you have a place you want to go, we can make a plan and go during the Lunar New Year."

He was so obedient. Xu Zhi felt a pang of happiness, then remembering something, she looked at him deeply and suddenly said, "Let me ask you something."

Liang Jinmo: "What is it?"

"You said before..." She spoke very slowly. "You didn't plan on living very long... You said that the time you were smoking."

Liang Jinmo: "I remember."

She hesitated slightly. "Then now... have your thoughts changed?"

The air grew quiet. She felt her own heartbeat slow down a bit, held in suspense by this unresolved question.

Liang Jinmo did not answer immediately. She bit her lip. "I... I'm stating this in advance, I... I am going to live for a very long time. My... my future husband must also be very long-lived, and he has to stay with me all along, being together for a lifetime, not a single day less..."

She felt clumsy with words, her speech halting and stumbling, as if she still couldn't clearly and completely express what she meant. She was already mentally kicking herself, and her face grew somewhat flushed.

Could he understand?

She cautiously lowered her gaze, glancing sideways at him, her eyes tinged with a hint of grievance.

It was as if she were saying, how could you even think of dying first?

Liang Jinmo met her gaze for a moment. He pushed his chair back from the desk, grabbed her hand, pulled her down onto his lap, pinched her chin, and kissed her without a word.

Xu Zhi didn't understand. Weren't they having a proper conversation? Why suddenly kiss?

However, she had already grown quite accustomed to this kind of intimacy. She had discovered that Liang Jinmo liked having her sit on his lap. When he kissed her, he had certain habits: initially, he liked to pinch her chin, and then his hand would move to the back of her head, cupping it so she couldn't dodge, capturing every breath she took.

At this moment, his fingers wove through her hair, gently stroking, while the movements of his lips and teeth were slow yet firm. He parted her pearly teeth and drove straight in.

Xu Zhi felt somewhat dizzy from the kiss, her mind unable to turn properly, vaguely thinking, is he using this trick to change the subject?

Still, she couldn't care less. Her hands unconsciously climbed up onto the man's shoulders, drowning in his scent.

After a long while, the kiss ended. Both of them were breathless, their foreheads pressed against each other, their breathing intertwined.

Liang Jinmo lowered his gaze to look at her flushed face and crimson, moistened lips, his fingers pinching the soft flesh at her waist. "Did you taste it?"

With her wits scattered, Xu Zhi instinctively replied, "Hmm?"

"The smell of smoke."

Her heart was still racing. Her paused brain resumed working and comprehension dawned on her.

So...

This was his answer.

He gently pecked the corner of her lips again. "I plan to quit smoking."

"..." A wave of emotion surged in the depths of Xu Zhi's heart. Her tear-bright eyes could not conceal her pleasantly surprised joy. Overcome with excitement, she wrapped her arms around his neck and planted a heavy kiss on his cheek. "You're so good."

Gazing into each other's eyes, both of them were somewhat stirred.

Before Liang Jinmo could kiss her again, however, his phone rang on the desk.

He picked up the phone. Xu Zhi tried to get off his lap, but he held her fast in his arms.

She simply stayed seated on his lap and listened to him answer the call.

The call was from the psychiatric rehabilitation center. The staff member on the other end asked, "Mr. Liang, when are you coming over for the Lunar New Year this year? Our center will be on holiday soon, and we need to hand over duties to the staff on duty and make arrangements in advance."

Liang Jinmo lowered his eyes and, after a few seconds, said, "I'm not going over this year."

The person on the other end seemed stunned. After a good while, they asked, "You're not coming to see Ms. Gao?"

Liang Jinmo gave a low "Mn." "I probably won't go."

The other side fell silent for a few more seconds before saying, "Alright."

The call was hung up. Xu Zhi didn't speak for a moment.

Liang Jinmo put down the phone, looked at her again, and asked, "What are you thinking about?"

She couldn't help wrapping her arms around him again, asking softly, "In the past... did you go to see Auntie during the Lunar New Year?"

"Not to see her." He hugged her back as well, his high-bridged nose gently rubbing against her cheek. "During the Lunar New Year, I had nowhere else to go, so I would go there."

Xu Zhi was stunned.

"I said before, I don't care whether she recovers or not, but..." He spoke very slowly. "When I returned to China and went to find her, I indeed had the naive thought of wondering if she would regret things. But on the very day I went back, something happened; she turned on the gas and tried to commit suicide that very day."

Xu Zhi opened her eyes wide in disbelief.

"Later on, there were a few more times. She tried to slash her wrists. Her search history was full of how to buy sleeping pills, and whether paraquat poisoning is painful," his tone was remarkably calm. "I thought about ignoring her back then, and even prepared to go back to Beicheng."

Xu Zhi listened quietly, her arms tightening around him once more.

Liang Jinmo had indeed planned to leave the small town that day. Since Gao Ying wanted to die so badly, let her die.

He had spent over half a month locked in a tug-of-war with her, even getting injured while snatching the knife from her hand, and he had found the whole thing meaningless.

Yet, before getting on the expressway, he turned his car around and went back.

The decision he made to bring Gao Ying to Beicheng and send her to a psychiatric hospital was because he didn't know anywhere else that could care for such a patient.

He had no time, no energy, and certainly no mood to take care of Gao Ying.

However, looking across the entire world, there was nowhere he could return to, and Gao Ying was his mother.

He said to Xu Zhi, "During the New Year, I will go see her because, apart from being by her side, it seems I can't find anywhere else to go."

The hotel room was empty and barren, never feeling like a home. Xu Zhi didn't know how he had endured that kind of loneliness.

At that instant, she recalled Zhao Niaoqiao's words. Outsiders speculated about why he sent his own mother to a psychiatric hospital, assuming he wanted to take revenge on Gao Ying. But in reality, she ought to have understood better than anyone else that everyone in this world holds some attachment to their mother, and such an attachment is very difficult to completely sever.

Yet she, too, had once doubted him because of this, and she felt a pang of guilt.

She held him tightly, then forced a smile. "It's fine. This year, we'll spend the New Year together."

He kissed her face and softly murmured, "Mn."

"However..."

She paused, then said, "We should still make a trip there."

He furrowed his brows slightly as he looked at her.

She said, "No need to wait for the New Year. Let's go today or tomorrow. I'll go with you."