Chapter Seventy-One: Bamboozle
Yuan Tiangang's face was filled with shock, but he quickly closed his eyes and began to calculate with his fingers. After a moment, he opened his eyes, a look of delight shining within them. "What a marvelous charity! This charity will become the guardian star of our Great Tang!"
Sun Simiao was even more excited. "Young friend, could you tell me who is in charge of this charity?"
Li Yi’s expression was odd, barely holding back laughter. "The overall head of this charity is none other than our Great Tang's most esteemed Empress, and as for the president of the charity foundation—well, that is the Princess Changle!"
At these words, Sun Simiao's old face flushed crimson, his mind instantly freezing. "Young friend...you...are you really...ah!"
Yuan Tiangang could only force a bitter smile. "Brother, I have wronged you. Now I am absolutely certain you can speak before His Majesty!"
The two of them nearly spat out a mouthful of old blood. Damn it, after all that, it turned out that they still had to treat Changle and the Empress. It was like being shown a broad, shining path, only to be told at the end, "This road is mine, and if you want to pass, pay up."
But Li Yi's face quickly turned serious. "Master Sun, I assure you, I had no intention of making sport of you. The charity must be overseen by the Empress and Princess Changle; this was decided long ago, and it is not me deliberately making things difficult for you. Moreover, I guarantee that whether or not you treat them, the foundation will still provide funding for the construction of the medical academy and hospital. When I first proposed this charity to His Majesty, I made it clear: charity must never serve an individual or private interest, and personal matters must not be mixed in. One is one, two is two—seek truth from facts, and be pragmatic and honest! So, Master Sun, please be at ease—what I said just now was by no means any form of coercion."
Yuan Tiangang’s jaw dropped. "Brother! The idea of the charity was yours? Genius, prodigy, almost monstrous! I wonder, would you mind if I read your physiognomy?"
"I don’t mind," Li Yi replied, "but don't say I didn't warn you. Our master once tried to read my face, but not only did he fail to see anything, he ended up injured. Are you sure you want to try?"
Yuan Tiangang’s face turned bright red, and he smiled awkwardly. "Ahem, well, brother, let’s just pretend I never brought it up."
Sun Simiao, however, looked on with admiration. "Young friend Li, to be honest, if you hadn’t said what you just did, I might not have agreed to treat the Empress and the Princess. But now, I cannot refuse. Not only for the sake of your extraordinary talent, but because they are responsible for the charity foundation, for the sake of our Great Tang’s charitable cause, I cannot let any harm come to them!"
Li Yi beamed, his face blooming like a chrysanthemum. "Master, do you truly agree?"
Sun Simiao chuckled. "Indeed, I agree!"
"Oh, yes!" Li Yi grinned, showing off his big teeth, laughing like a fool.
"Young friend, enough celebrating—let’s discuss when we’ll go to see the patients!"
Li Yi sobered and thought carefully. "Hmm, there’s no rush. Changle suffers from a qi disorder, which cannot be cured in a short time. A couple of days won’t make a difference. The charity hasn’t officially opened, the merchants’ alliance has not been established, and there is still a major crisis unresolved—the timing is not right."
"Here’s what we’ll do, Master: for now, why don’t you consult your records? Changle’s illness is a qi disorder, a type of pulmonary disease. Think about how you’d treat it, and later organize your medical notes systematically. Once I’ve dealt with these affairs, I’ll bring you into the palace!"
"A qi disorder? Yes, I’ll need to prepare. This is a good plan. I’ll await your word here at Xuandu Temple."
"Good, it’s settled!" With that, Li Yi turned to bid farewell to Yuan Tiangang, as he had other matters to attend to. Unexpectedly, Li Chunfeng, who had been silent all along, suddenly rushed up and grabbed him.
"Master Uncle, please wait!"
"What is it? You need something? You know your Master Uncle is a man worth millions at any moment, so speak quickly!"
Li Chunfeng was momentarily stunned, then flashed a fawning smile. "Master Uncle, would you be willing to teach me your arithmetic methods? Would you instruct your nephew?"
As Director of the Imperial Observatory, Li Chunfeng was renowned for his calculations and reasoning, yet even he was stunned by the speed at which Li Yi had estimated those numbers earlier.
Li Yi was about to refuse outright—he didn’t have time to teach elementary math to Li Chunfeng. But then he realized something: once the bank, the merchants’ alliance, and the charity foundation were established, arithmetic would be indispensable for management. How could such vast organizations be run without it? The manpower and resources it would consume! Since Li Chunfeng was willing to learn, why not teach him and let him instruct others? It would be once and for all, so much more efficient. Plus, Li Chunfeng was clever and had a solid foundation—he’d surely grasp it quickly. Ha! What a genius I am.
Having thought it through, Li Yi flashed a scheming smile. "Chunfeng, ordinarily, your Master Uncle is extremely busy and has no time to teach you. But since you’re my nephew, I’ll make an exception. If, after I’ve taught you, you promise to teach a few others, so that this method can be passed on, what do you say?"
Perhaps out of kindness, respect for knowledge, or simply a genuine desire to learn, Li Chunfeng never suspected Li Yi’s little scheme, and instead looked at him with admiration. "Master Uncle, you are truly magnanimous! To possess such skill and still be willing to share it with the world—my heart cannot compare. Rest assured, I will do my utmost to assist you and carry this forward!"
Li Yi’s mouth twitched, suppressing a laugh. "Very well! That’s enough for me. Starting tomorrow, come to the Li residence every afternoon, and I’ll teach you the ways of arithmetic." With that, he bid farewell to Yuan Tiangang, not forgetting to bring Lan Wei along. He was certain that with this chubby fellow, his days would be filled with endless amusement.
"Fatty, why are you so quiet?" Li Yi asked the silently trudging Lan Wei on the way home.
"Huff, huff... You’re too much—you ride a horse while I walk, and yet you want me to chat with you? Huff, where would I get the energy!"
Li Yi lay lazily on Juechen’s back, a blade of grass in his mouth. "I say, Fatty, for someone so plump, you sure are lazy. Do you do anything but eat and breathe all day?"
Lan Wei trudged along on his thick legs, gasping for breath. Seeing Li Yi lounging on horseback, he suddenly plopped down on the ground, panting heavily.
Li Yi leapt off the horse. "Fatty, get up, let me see if you’ve made a dent in the earth. Good grief—is that your backside or a cannon? That thud was louder than an Italian artillery shell!"
Lan Wei wiped the sweat from his brow, curiosity in his eyes. "Italian cannon? What’s that?"
Li Yi bit down on the grass, grinning. "Want to know? Call me Master, and maybe I’ll tell you."
Lan Wei’s face darkened, turning purple. He turned his head away. "No!"
"Heh, it’s only a matter of time—sooner or later, you’ll give in. Might as well just accept it now!"
"I won’t!"
"Tell you what: if you agree to call me Master from now on, I’ll make sure you have meat for dinner tonight—eat as much as you want!"
Lan Wei was clearly tempted; he thought about chicken drumsticks, glanced at Li Yi’s mischievous face, then resolutely wiped the drool from his mouth. "No!"
"Alright, how about this: if you call me Master, I’ll stop calling you Fatty from now on. How about that?"
Lan Wei suddenly turned his head. "Deal!"
"Great! A man’s word is his bond. Now, let’s hear you call me Master."
Lan Wei’s face turned crimson, and in a mosquito’s whisper, he squeezed out two words. "...Master..."
"What? I can’t hear you!"
Fatty Lan shouted, "Master!" and then promptly turned his head away.
Li Yi chuckled. "Ah, good disciple, now get up! Blue Fatty!"
"You’re cheating! You said you wouldn’t call me Fatty anymore!"
"I said I wouldn’t call you Fatty, but never said I wouldn’t call you Blue Fatty!"
"You’re shameless!"
"Heh, a man with no shame is invincible—shamelessness conquers all! That’s your first lesson from your Master. Now get up, we need to get home early!"
Blue Fatty thought for a moment, pushed himself up, and wobbled to his feet, following Li Yi as they made their way back.
"Master, will there be meat tonight?"
"Meat? Didn’t you just refuse me earlier?"
"But I agreed in the end!"
"The deal was that I’d stop calling you Fatty, not that you’d get meat. What’s that got to do with it?"
"You...you’re truly shameless, little Master!"
"What’s this about little Master? Just call me Master!"
"Hmph! You get to be shameless, but I can’t be slippery? I learned it from you!"
"Good lad, you learn quickly—there’s a future for you!"
"Thank you for your praise, little Master!"
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