Chapter Sixty-Three: I Have a Well

Chapter Sixty-Three: I Have a Well

"Yes! I'll go wash right now, right away. Brother Zhang, don’t be afraid of them. If anyone dares trouble you, I’ll smash his head in!" Guo Nu grinned, bowed, and swaggered past Zhang Qian into the house, looking prouder than if he'd just been praised.

Steward Cui immediately led several sharp-witted servants to see Guo Nu washed and dressed. Zhang Qian, no longer needing to worry about settling Guo Nu, stepped back with a smile and nodded to Lala Wanwang, "I come from a family of scholars and farmers, not merchants. Yet, your kingdom and the Tang Empire are now bound by marriage, and since you have come so sincerely requesting a few bottles of Six Spirits Flower Dew, I cannot let you return empty-handed. So, in view of your long journey, and out of regard for Registrar Zhu, I am willing to personally prepare some Six Spirits Flower Dew for you. Remember, I’m merely helping you make it, not selling it as a business—do you understand?"

"Understood, understood! Not a business, not a business!" Lala Wanwang, who had all but lost hope of obtaining Six Spirits Flower Dew, caught a hint of possibility in Zhang Qian’s words and nodded enthusiastically, like a chick pecking at grain.

"Because the quantity you ask for is large, even though I am helping, I must ask you to pay some cost price." Seeing his attitude no longer arrogant, Zhang Qian, not one to turn away business that came to his door, smiled and continued, "Soon, I’ll have someone appraise the goods you’ve brought, calculate their true value here in Chang’an, and deduct that as a deposit. Don’t worry, for Registrar Zhu’s sake, I won’t let you suffer any loss. However, Six Spirits Flower Dew is exceedingly difficult to make. You’ll have to wait at least a month before it’s ready. Can you wait that long?"

"I can! Of course I can!" Lala Wanwang’s attitude improved a hundredfold, and he nodded again and again with a broad grin.

"Master Zhang, your virtue and generosity are engraved in my heart!" Zhu Liang, having gained both profit and goodwill, felt all the more fond of Zhang Qian, and bowed repeatedly at his side.

Seeing them both so agreeable, Zhang Qian decided to do the good deed thoroughly. Frowning as if in thought, he quickly recalled a famous marketing case from the twenty-first century. "Let me make something clear, Mr. Lala Wanwang. The reason I refused to sell you the formula earlier wasn’t just to keep my master’s secrets, but also to protect their reputation. I didn’t want you to spend a fortune only to buy something useless."

He paused deliberately, giving his listener a moment to digest this, then grew solemn. "To speak plainly, even if I gave you the formula, you still couldn’t make the same flower dew. Its value lies not only in the rare herbs, but also in the water used for distillation—it must come from a sacred spring, blessed by the gods themselves!"

"A sacred spring?" The plateau was still under the sway of the old faiths, and Lala Wanwang had no doubts about gods or miracles. Hearing Zhang Qian speak so gravely, he instinctively echoed the words.

"Exactly, a sacred spring. Do you know why I spared no expense to purchase this manor from the former master? After studying the lay of the land and the flow of rivers, I found that this place holds an ancient well, once favored by Heaven. Its water is uniquely suited for making flower dew." Zhang Qian glanced around with an air of mystery. "Without the water from this well, even with the formula and all the ingredients, you could never make the same flower dew!"

Who could surpass the merchants of modern Europe in the art of persuasion? In their hands, even the need to save firewood for roasting grain became a legendary ‘peat flavor’ in whiskey, selling at many times the price. Ordinary tap water, when drawn from a special well and analyzed for trace minerals, suddenly became worth a fortune to the gullible. Zhang Qian had read countless academic critiques of such marketing tricks in school, but no matter how rigorous the research, it never stopped the so-called upper class from throwing money at these merchants year after year.

By analogy, he saw no reason the same trick shouldn’t work on a few cunning plateau traders in the eighth century—especially since, in the absence of any scientific means, no one could prove that the well water in his courtyard was no different from any other.

As for the fact that there was, at present, no ancient well in his yard? Simple enough—once night fell, he would have someone dig one! The surrounding fields were so waterlogged that crops struggled to grow; how could there not be well water underground?

As expected, at the mention of a sacred spring, Lala Wanwang immediately abandoned all thought of acquiring the formula. After a long daze, he sighed and bowed deeply, "Thank you, Master Zhang, for speaking plainly. Otherwise, I would certainly have made a grave mistake today. The journey from the plateau to Chang’an is harsh and arduous. I beg you, as the servant of the Tang Emperor’s son-in-law, to make as much Six Spirits Flower Dew as possible for us, so that we may carry it home on horseback and offer it to the gods."

"That can be done," Zhang Qian replied with a gentle nod and a smile. "The Tang Empire and your kingdom are now family, so how could I neglect you? However, Six Spirits Flower Dew is a worldly commodity, more suited to fragrant cleansing of the body than to sacred rites. For offerings to Heaven, I would suggest a different item entirely. I possess something called Universal Balm—fragrant and golden as purest gold, yet far lighter to transport. A single large jar weighs only two or three pounds, and a mere dab upon the altar each day will dispel any evil."

"Universal Balm? I’ve heard of it, but until now, never seen it with my own eyes," Lala Wanwang exclaimed, both surprised and delighted. Bowing low, he implored, "If you could bestow a sample, Master Zhang…"

"Why not! Ren Quan, fetch a box of Universal Balm, the kind packed in a wooden case!" Zhang Qian interrupted with a laugh, finding his guest ever more agreeable as they spoke.

"At once!" Chief Steward Ren Quan, who had been stifling laughter to the point of pain, was overjoyed to receive the order and hurried off.

Soon he returned, bearing a box of Universal Balm—Zhang Qian’s final choice for packaging, decided just the night before. Like a courtier presenting a treasure, he laid it before the assembled guests.

"Here is Universal Balm," Zhang Qian announced, opening the box and scooping a little out to dab on the sides of his own nose. Then, taking the box from Ren Quan, he stepped forward and, with great courtesy, placed it in Lala Wanwang’s hands.

Inside, the ointment gleamed gold, just as he’d described, and its scent was many times stronger than that of Six Spirits Flower Dew, so potent that it refreshed the very air around their nostrils.

Lala Wanwang, a man who knew quality when he saw it, instinctively believed oil must be more valuable than water. The intense fragrance and golden color filled him with joy. "Thank you, Master Zhang. This is perfect for offering to Heaven!"

"Hmm!" Zhang Qian simply nodded and began to edge away. He could hardly bear it; even with balm under his own nose, the smell was overwhelming. He could only marvel at how Registrar Zhu, who spent his days at Lala Wanwang’s side, had managed to survive so long.

"Master Zhang, how much more Universal Balm do you have? I’ll take it all," Lala Wanwang said, mistaking Zhang Qian’s retreat for reluctance to sell.

"Oh, I don’t sell things. I’m no merchant," Zhang Qian smiled, quickly quoting a price just a bit higher than Six Spirits Flower Dew, "Each box costs four hundred Kaiyuan coins to make. I don’t have much left—about five hundred boxes. But I can’t give them all to you; I must reserve a hundred for friends and family."

"I’ll take them all!" Lala Wanwang declared, biting his lip and stamping his foot. "I’ll take the remaining four hundred boxes today!"

"That won’t do," Zhang Qian replied, delighted but still shaking his head. "The balm must be blessed with my master’s secret incantation for seven days to preserve its fragrance. My people have only finished three days—four more to go. Come back in five days, and I guarantee you can take away four hundred boxes."

Seeing Lala Wanwang’s look of reluctance, Zhang Qian added with a smile, "This balm is even harder to make than the flower dew. If you want more, every time someone comes down from the plateau, they can ask me to make more. But in future, I won’t accept your jade, tiger peni, animal bones, herbs, or gold."

"Then what do you want? Whatever I can pay, just name it!" In Lala Wanwang’s eyes, the only worthwhile goods from the plateau were those he’d already laid out. Hearing Zhang Qian ask for none of them, he grew flustered.

"Yaks!" Zhang Qian answered without hesitation, having long planned this. "Send men to drive live yaks here to Chang’an. For every yak, I’ll trade you two boxes of Universal Balm!"

"Truly?" Lala Wanwang was overcome with joy, his bloodshot eyes wide as he pressed, "You truly want only yaks, nothing else? In Tubo, we have yaks everywhere—no, more than enough to trade for all your balm. The only worry is you might not have enough to match!"

Yaks couldn’t plow fields, so in the Tang Empire they were worth little, even here in Chang’an, selling for no more than two hundred coins apiece—yet Zhang Qian offered two boxes of balm per animal! Such a generous price left Lala Wanwang ecstatic.

"The Tang Empire and Tubo are now family," Zhang Qian replied, his face the picture of sincerity, "Since we are now kin, we should care for each other. The journey is no small feat, so for you, one yak for two boxes of balm, at cost price, no labor charged. Bring the yaks to my door, and I’ll take as many as you bring!"

"Deal!" Fearing Zhang Qian might reconsider, Lala Wanwang reached out and slapped his hand down.

With a resounding clap, Zhang Qian met his palm, then stepped back with a grin. In that moment, all trace of stench vanished from his nose, replaced by the imagined savor of beef prepared in countless ways.

Beef! Since arriving in the Tang Empire, Zhang Qian hadn’t tasted beef at all. In these times, slaughtering an ox was a crime second only to murder.

But yaks couldn’t plow; no one cared if they were butchered for meat. Three to five hundred a year—he could eat as he pleased!

Braised, stewed, dried, hotpot—the mere thought made Zhang Qian’s mouth water.